Roots Run Deep
This past weekend I visited my grandmother in my home town. She lives on the same farm where she grew up, which is the same place my sister and I were also raised. Coming from “the big city”, sometimes I forget the stillness and peace that resides there. I don’t visit as much as I should, as life gets busy and I don’t find the time to make the hour and a half drive south. But something was different this time. There was something about the peace of the land that consumed me. It was as if I couldn’t get enough of it. I wanted to absorb every moment of the sight, smells and the sounds.
Living in the city you can forget what quiet sounds like; to hear the locusts in the trees, birds singing, and the cows talking to each other in the field. Where the only motor vehicle you may hear is a lawn mower or a tractor in the distance. I couldn’t believe how beautiful it was. I’ve witnessed this scene a thousand times but this time it felt different. As I sat on her back porch, reading a book and drinking coffee, I watched as the sun rose over the freshly cut field waiting to be raked to produce bales of hay. The sun was starting to feel hot on my face, but it didn’t matter. I wanted to take in this moment that I failed to take in so many times before.
Many times God gives us something beautiful in our life but we miss it over and over again. Rather than cherish it, we look past it for something better. We fail to realize the beauty and simplicity that we yearn for has been right in front of us the entire time. All we have to do is realize it’s there. How many times do we stop long enough to absorb a moment? Look at someone we love and just smile; Go for a walk and watch the sunset with no conversation; Love without condition; Listen to your surroundings instead of your thoughts; Meditate; Breathe; Smile; Laugh; Enjoy.
My whole life I've tried to escape that place, deny my roots, because it wasn’t fulfilling. Looking back, I believe I wanted to escape my childhood and the experiences that brought pain. I didn’t want to associate myself with the physical location because it was a place that brought anxiety and tears, unforgiveness, feelings of hate and fear. Now that I’m older and I’m in a different space, my appreciation for the geographical location has grown. My desire for a slower, simpler, more patient life has arrived. Rather than focusing on my past, I can see where God is leading me. Rather than feeling anxious, I feel peace. A peace that is not contingent upon anyone or anything. I am experiencing God’s love and this is the result. I am free to enjoy my life because I choose to. As if scales are falling off my eyes that I’ve refused to remove myself. When you are blind to something your whole life, darkness is all you know.
I’ve allowed pain to be wrapped so tight around my life. It’s not until I completely loosed my grip that God has begun to unravel it from me and open my eyes to what being free truly is. I have outgrown the shell of the life I thought I wanted or was supposed to live. It feels like a caterpillar escaping the cocoon growing into a butterfly. I am finding grace- a simple elegance in life. Becoming more refined by receiving God’s unmerited favor in my life. I’m grateful for this journey. No one can take this from me as long as I wake up every day and CHOOSE how I’m going to live my life each day. And for that, I am thankful.
And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.
Thank you for joining me in Finding Grace.
Enjoy the journey